Late

The senior management “At the Center with Freddie and Benny” regrets the late appearance of the blog. We were delayed because… um

...we were abducted by aliens who realized that tuxedo cats were the most intelligent life-forms on the planet and wanted us to mediate intergalactic peace efforts and the flying saucer just dropped us off.

No, no, no too crazy. Well, not the ‘most intelligent life-forms’ part. But humans don’t like to be reminded.

…we were trapped in a helium balloon shaped like a flying saucer and went careening across the Midwest.

Been done. Something more local, maybe.

We were hiking on the Appalachian Trail without telling anyone, especially our nearest and dearest, where we are.

Sounds fishy. And not in a delicious way.

…Freddie invaded Rockingham County where the natives hailed him as a god and he could only tear himself away by swearing, paw-on-heart, to return.

Possible.

“Whatcha doin’?”

“Oh, hi, Benny. I’m just coming up with a plausible explanation for why our blog is late.”

“Late? Our blog was late? Oh no! It’s a disaster! Call the board! Send all the volunteers to Siberia for cultural reprogramming!”

“I don’t think it’s really any big deal. We say we’re sorry and move on.”

“I don’t think so, Freddie. There’ll be hearings. We may have to resign. Our carriers are in ruins! Oh! I’m panting.”

“Here, use this paper bag!”

“Thanks!”

“I meant to breathe into, not to play with. Oh well, whatever works. Feel better?”

“Yeah. Thanks! Hey, why don’t we tell the truth? Our typist is a bit of a flake.”

“We could, I ‘spose. Honesty being the better part of not having to remember what you said later and all that. There’s just one problem.”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“We’d have to get her to type it.”